How Things Change ~ Tag: Rhianwen/Linnea

The lands around New Atricis that are regarded as Atricis' new territory. Not as big as their previous protective range, but still lots of space and wilds to explore. Dragon Flights and Wher Runs also occur across these lands.
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Parker
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Joined: Sat Mar 14, 2015 10:46 pm
Title: High Ebilness
Pronouns: He/Him
Age: 32

Wed Aug 08, 2018 7:40 pm

"I'm sorry you don't get to take any time for yourself when you visit. I can't imagine the meetings are all that fun, even if they are necessary." Sid wasn't a stranger to meetings. As a still practicing dragonhealer he had to go to meetings for journeymen healers on occasion. The masters at the Healer Hall would around once a turn send down a very thick report on the standards of methods on current practices. Sid hated those meetings for all they were important. Still, it wasn't often that something came up that could be considered exciting or new with his craft.

"I go to Benden to visit family, generally. I take Liz up there to visit with Ambr as many times a turn as I can. My parents enjoy getting to see both her and Servaas." Sid explained. The last visit he'd made to Benden hadn't been the best of times, though. Everything had been very fresh with wounds still open and bleeding. He liked to think that he was better than then, but... well, it was hard to tell. "That's true. The snow does make things harder for a lot of people. I suppose it's easy to forget that when you haven't lived somewhere that snow falls regularly."

Sid picked up his bottle of whisky and took a drink from it as he listened to her. Learn to tolerate someone you despised? What if the person you despised was yourself? Could he learn to tolerate himself? Sid hoped so and he hoped it happened sooner rather than later. This misery he felt, though yes it was a bit better with the physical changes, was really wearing him down. Being depressed, yes he knew he was, hurt...physically, mentally, and emotionally. Perhaps he should see a mindhealer, but he really didn't want to either. "No, it's not a bad thing inherently...but...I can't say that I was actively looking for it either. And honestly....I can't really say I know who I am right now...maybe I'll find me again, but I think it's going to be awhile before that happens." Some of the sorrow he felt seeped into his voice and into his eyes. Quickly he tried to shoo it away. "Sorry, didn't mean to get so down on you."
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F'lin & Mnenomth | C'sian & Gastoneth | Sid'nis & Iolith | Ao'mek & Tlamehath | Lorcan & Hydranth
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So'cles & Ylpeysth | Locke & Wraith | Kisle'vis & Cetovas | Journeyman Zaynallen
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Darrow & Argow | Naji & Weisdan | Car'vis and Corentivis | Ferghas & Fersk | Corbin & Corsk

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Linnea
Posts: 335
Joined: Mon Mar 16, 2015 11:22 pm
Age: 29

Sun Aug 19, 2018 1:05 am

Rhianwen smiled as Sid'nis spoke about family. Her eldest brother was the Lord Holder of Telgar now. He and his wife were busy with the running of the territory. Rhianwen could find it in her schedule to visit, but that would also mean coming face to face with her parents. That had ceased being a possibility since her mind had entwined with gold. Benden Hold was just as forbidden to her now for the exact same reason. And there were far too many reasons she could not visit Inez. It meant all three of Rhianwen's earlier homes were lost to her, along with the family that filled them.

"I'm sure they are all happy to see you, as well," Rhianwen replied to Sid'nis's comment about his parents appreciating seeing his children.

Change was an inevitable part of life, no matter how welcome. It was also capricious, with no confirmation any change would ever turn out as hoped, or even when hoped, for. "It's good to take your time," Rhianwen agreed, "The important things always do seem to take the longest, even if we wish it were not so." The watered wine was a good chase for the food as she left the rest for Sid'nis to eat. She would be hungry later, but she had the shape and size to spare a meal when she could eat plenty at supper to make up for it.

"And your mood is allowed to be what it is, so do not concern yourself with getting me down." Rhianwen looked up into the bright blue sky and sighed. "With a day like today absolutely nothing could get me down." Her broad smile soaked up the sun for a moment before she peeked back over at Sid'nis. "Besides, there's nothing wrong for seeking help, either, whether it be a professional or simply an ear that is willing to listen. I am not versed in the ways of a healer, let alone a mindhealer, so I can offer little advice or assistance. But I've found that simply telling somebody can sometimes help greatly." Rhianwen paused as she realized how that may sound. "Not...not that I'm suggesting I need to be that someone."
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Parker
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Title: High Ebilness
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Age: 32

Sat Aug 25, 2018 12:31 am

"Yeah, I'm sure they do, but its obvious they are always more excited to see the grandkids. Which, I can understand. Grandchildren can be spoiled and cuddled. You sort of lose those privileges when you grow up." Sid stated with a chuckle, trying to lighten his own mood. "I was an only child, so the fact I have two kids thrills my parents, Mom especially." He didn't mind it really. He knew his family would always be there for him.

"I suppose it is. I don't think I have much choice in how long this will take, though." Sid stated. He wasn't sure if this change was important. It felt more...unnecessary. Change was a part of life. It was a certainty. However, at this moment, he just couldn't see what good could come of this forced change. He didn't feel like a better person for it. Though, in the back of his mind, he knew that if he changed his perspective and looked for some sort of silver lining then maybe some good could come from it. He was simply too cynical to want to try and look for the good now.

Sid'nis listened to her and he knew that she was right. He'd spoken with people....well, mainly just V'an. Rath had helped too, but he should probably talk to someone more professional. However, the thought of doing that didn't settle with him. Perhaps that was because he didn't really want help right now? There was still a part of him that didn't feel he deserved to be happy again. That was a problem, he knew that. "Thanks, I know talking helps. I just...I don't know...I guess I don't want to talk about it. I'd love to just forget...you know? That's not at all possible, but.." He gave a small shrug, "I wish it was. Really though, thank you. You're a good person, Rhianwen, and a damn fine leader. The weyr is better for you." He said with sincerity.
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F'lin & Mnenomth | C'sian & Gastoneth | Sid'nis & Iolith | Ao'mek & Tlamehath | Lorcan & Hydranth
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So'cles & Ylpeysth | Locke & Wraith | Kisle'vis & Cetovas | Journeyman Zaynallen
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Darrow & Argow | Naji & Weisdan | Car'vis and Corentivis | Ferghas & Fersk | Corbin & Corsk

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Linnea
Posts: 335
Joined: Mon Mar 16, 2015 11:22 pm
Age: 29

Sun Sep 30, 2018 11:31 pm

Rhianwen smiled as Sid'nis talked more about his children and their relationship with his parents. Rhianwen hadn't known her own grandparents. Being such a late-in-life surprise as she was, her parents parents had already passed by the time Rhianwen took her first breath. It made it hard to relate to what he said, so she left it fade, instead, with: "I'm glad your children get to build that connection."

Unwanted change was something Rhianwen was far more familiar with. She did not know what had hurt Sid'nis so thoroughly, but she huffed a laugh as he expressed a wish to forget. "While it was originally for the intents of becoming the Lady of a Hold, leadership is something I was trained in," she addressed his praise of her first, "I do it no better than anyone else with the same opportunities would. But I appreciate your words."

Only then did she continue from her earlier reaction and Sid'nis's earlier words. "It would be so much easier to forget the stuff that hurt," she agreed with a brittle smile. "As a child, the masterharper who taught me said difficulties faced in life temper us into the people we become. A blacksmith uses intense heat to purify precious metals that can become delicate necklace. He uses that same heat and extreme force to forge a sword or a shield. Without it, the necklace is impure and imperfect; easy to overlook and not worth the marks you'd spend on it. A sword or a shield could become brittle and shatter under a single heavy blow. It sounded poetic when I was a child. That we would become something better and perfect. But there have been times I wished I could have shattered. And, even now, I wonder if anyone ever reaches a point when they are complete. I can't say what's better; I'm sure the answer is different for everyone and changes quickly. I guess we can only hope it's worth it in the end."
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Parker
Site Admin
Posts: 2475
Joined: Sat Mar 14, 2015 10:46 pm
Title: High Ebilness
Pronouns: He/Him
Age: 32

Wed Oct 03, 2018 3:13 pm

"Yeah, me too." Sid had gotten to spend some time with his own grandparents before they passed. It was his maternal grandmother that he was the closest to. Her husband, his papaw, had died when Sid was only six. She was a fiery woman who wasn't afraid to speak her mind. Honestly, now that he looked back on it, she was the matriarch of the family. Whenever there was a problem it was to her that they sought advice. She was a harper and a very wise woman. One of his favorite memories of her was sitting at the piano and watching her play. If he tried he could probably still play the songs he watched her play thanks to his memory. He wanted his own kids to have those sorts of memories.

"Just because a person is trained for something, doesn't mean they're automatically good at it." Sid commented with a warm smile. It didn't really surprise him that Rhiawen wouldn't just take a compliment without a measure of logic and humility. That was also what made her a good leader.

Sid listened to her as she told him what it was her master had taught her, but he really didn't want to. He wasn't in a head space to listen to things that told him that the shit he was going through now would make him a better person in the end. What he was going through he wouldn't wish on an enemy. "No one is perfect, so I doubt anyone will ever be fully complete." He stated, though he tried to keep the cynicism out of his voice as he spoke. "Hmph. Yeah. Worth it. Well, if you ever come across some spare hope send it my way.I think I could use an extra dose or five."

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F'lin & Mnenomth | C'sian & Gastoneth | Sid'nis & Iolith | Ao'mek & Tlamehath | Lorcan & Hydranth
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So'cles & Ylpeysth | Locke & Wraith | Kisle'vis & Cetovas | Journeyman Zaynallen
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Darrow & Argow | Naji & Weisdan | Car'vis and Corentivis | Ferghas & Fersk | Corbin & Corsk

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