Time For A Sit Down [Parker/Esca]

[Kate]

\Talen frowned, running a hand through his short brown hair, his green eyes starring back at him from the reflection in the mirror. Was he really going to do this? He didn't want to, but he knew he had to, especially now. Cas had decided to confess his feelings for him, and honestly, Talen had been having a hard time fighting back the old feelings he had for his friend as well. He had hid them back home, and thought he had buried them here. Seeing his best friend again though. That had really thrown him for a loop. He didn't want to tell Esca that he had feelings for someone else. He had to admit, he still...cared for Esca, but, his feelings for Cas were much more prominent. He didn't know what else to say about it. He already figured Esca would understand, just because that's the kind of man Talen had always taken him to be. He just, didn't want to hurt anyone, but he knew no matter what, someone was going to get hurt. That was basically the long and the short of it. No matter what he did, someone was going to get hurt to some degree, and he really, really did not like the thought of that.

He looked at himself one more time in the mirror, before checking to make sure that Khonlen was asleep. What he was going to do would probably be easier for the Quartz to not know about. He didn't think it would upset him to much, but then again, he didn't really want to take that chance. Although his cub was older now, he was still very protective of him when it came to things like this. He really didn't want anything to come between them, although he highly doubted it would anyway. With one last look at the young, sleeping cub, he smiled a bit and walked out the door.

He walked to the actual apartments (not the wherling barracks), and took a deep breath as he stood in front of Esca's familiar door. His green eyes stared at it for a moment, his arms almost not wanting to move. He finally took one more deep breath and knocked on the door.

[Parker]

Adianca had been more than needy this evening. She'd demanded she hunt, then demanded she be bathed, and only now had Esca finished with her demand to be oiled perfectly. The red haired man wasn't blind to what was happening...his lovely green girl was going to run soon. He'd been bonded to Adi long enough to recognize the signals. Generally, he kept his door shut during her runs since dayhandlers weren't as affected as riders, but...there was a part of him that was tempted to leave it open. Why he wasn't sure, but it was a thought that had fluttered through his mind a few times. It had taken a bit of effort but eventually he'd made his day wher happy enough that she was content to lay on her bed and sleep.

Was she was slumbering peacefully, Esca could finally begin to work on some things for his craft. Some of the equations that he'd worked out during his last outing with Devyn needed a bit of reworking. He couldn't deny that a part of him had been a bit distracted while he wrote down numbers and tried to work them into something that made sense. At least the numbers were correct even if their part in the equation wasn't. There was a part of him that felt bad for being so distracted while they worked, but he couldn't help it. Devyn was rather attractive.

It was thoughts of those piercing eyes and that strong jawline that were interrupted by the sudden knock on the door. Esca's brows furrowed as he looked at the door. With a stretch he got up from his seat. He closed his journal that he was working in and moved across the room. "Talen?!" He asked with some surprise upon seeing the face of his good friend and new quartzhandler. "What are you doing here?" He asked with curiosity. He knew that Khonlen was still a cub, technically, but that didn't stop his mind from wandering back to the last time Talen was in his apartment. "Please, come in." He said in a slightly nervous voice as he ushered Talen inside. "Can I get you a drink?"

[Kate]

Talen could not help but smile a bit as Esca came to the door. Thoughts of what had happened the last time he had been to Esca's apartmenrt came to his mind, and he quickly tried to push them away, not because they were bad, but because he didn't want to be distracted by them right now. He had come here with a purpose, and he intended to make sure he was going to accomplish that. He gave the red head a small smile when he saw the shocked look on his face. He had known Esca wasn't expecting him, and he couldn't tell if it was a happy shocked or not. "I just wanted to..erm...see you and talk to you. I'm a Weyrling now, and Khonlen is asleep. I figured.."

His voice trailed off for a moment. He still wasn't sure if he wanted this to happen, but he knew it had to. He had to know if Esca still felt the same about him. He cleared his throat and finally continued, "I figured maybe we could talk.." His green eyes looked at Esca, trying to see his reaction. The Green handler had to have known this was coming. They both did.

He smiled a bit and said, "Water would be nice...thank you.." He would much rather have some liquor, but he knew he couldn't. He knew it would probably have helped him calm down, but he was not allowed to indulge in such things with Khonlen still being a cub.

[Parker]

"I just wanted to..erm...see you and talk to you. I'm a Weyrling now, and Khonlen is asleep. I figured.."

Esca smiled at him and nodded while he shut the door behind him. There was a small part of him that was worried that they would get in trouble again, but it wasn't as if they were doing anything and it wasn't as if it was past curfew for Talen. He had no doubt that Talen was a little concerned about that too, but thought this was important enough to risk. "As I said before, you're always welcome here." He said, still being honest with his friend, though there was a bit of tension in the air now. Esca was glad to see Talen...actually see him...not just look at him from a distance.

"I figured maybe we could talk.."

Lips pressed together into a thin line for a moment as he nodded at Talen. "Yes, I figure that is probably a good idea." He said honestly. They knew what this talk would be about and there was no reason that they should beat around the proverbial bush about it. Esca sincerely doubted that Talen was looking forward to this conversation either, at least the tense way he was holding his shoulders was indicator of that. "As long as Khonlen is asleep and this is going to bother him." He wanted to make sure of that. While he personally had no idea how careful one had to be with the mind of a young cub, he couldn't imagine that it was all that different than with children.

"Water would be nice...thank you.."

He nodded and moved over to his small kitchen area and got a glass of water for Talen. For himself he poured a couple of fingers of whisky. Both of them likely needed the alcohol, so he might as well drink for them both. "Here you go." He said with a smile as he handed Talen the water. "Please, have a seat, make yourself comfortable." Esca stated as he gestured to his small table. He moved to his desk and sat down on the edge of it. It was far enough away that if someone should happen to burst in on them it was obvious that nothing more than talking was happening. "Alright. You go first." Esca offered. They both needed to speak, but Talen had broached the subject so it was only fair he speak first.

[Kate]

Talen could not help but smile a bit, his green eyes showing how grateful he was for Esca's friendship, and maybe more than that. If it wasn't for Esca, he would have probably never gotten anywhere with the nightmares. Esca had been there to listen, one of the only people since Cas that Talen had trusted to even talk about it to. Esca had always opened his door to him, as a friend, and as a lover. Although, technically it was considered a one night stand he guessed. They hadn't been together since, and he wasn't sure if they would be after this. He still managed to say, "Thanks...I still really appreciate it.."

Talen looked at Esca, glad they were at least thinking along the same lines, although he didn't know to what end, yet. They were going to find out today, that was for sure. He nodded a bit. "Khonlen should be fine. If he wakes up, we will have to be a bit more careful, but I'm pretty sure we still have a while to go before that." Khonlen usually slept for quiet a while, to the green eyed young man was not really worried about that. Plus, he had already had a conversation like this once before, and Khonlen had not been bothered by it at all since he had been asleep then as well.

Talen took a sip of the water as it was offered to him, and noticed that Esca had grabbed something stronger for himself. Talen found himself wishing, only slightly, that he could have a drink right now, but at least once of them could drink. He ran a hand through his dark hair as he put the glass down and cleared his throat. "Well, Khonlen is almost 7 months now. I..I know its not quiet time, but I just thought maybe we should start talking about us. About where we stand, and about moving forward...or...not..." He hated how the last words sounded, but...he felt as though they had needed to be said.

[Parker]

"Thanks...I still really appreciate it.."

"Of course, no need to thank me. I wouldn't say it if I didn't mean it." Esca assured him. Perhaps their relationship hadn't gone the way either of them had thought, but that didn't mean that he didn't still care about his friend. No matter what happened between them they would always be friends. He knew that Talen's nightmares were bad and had always been more than happy to talk to him about them or simply be there if he needed the company. Esca also knew that if he needed anything Talen would be there for him as well.

Esca nodded his head as Talen assured him that Khonlen was sleeping and would likely stay sleeping for awhile. That was good to know so he didn't feel like he needed to not say what needed to be said between them. "Shards, seven months already? I can't believe it's been that long since you bonded." How time did fly. It wouldn't be much longer until his child would be born. That was something he certainly was looking forward to and knew that Carrot was probably ready to be done being pregnant. His attention was pulled back to Talen at the words 'talking about us'. The quartzhandler might have been shocked to know that his words didn't stun or shock him.

"Yes, I suppose it is better for us to figure it out now." Esca agreed with him. "Firstly, I feel I should say that no matter what you will always be a friend to me." He stated firmly. He didn't want Talen to make a decision on his feelings based on whether or not he would lose a friend if he decided he'd rather their relationship remain platonic. "So...what do you feel...about us?" He asked bluntly, figuring that might be the best way to go about this.

[Kate]

Green eyes looked at Esca once again. He knew he was lucky to have such an amazing friend. He had been there for him, making him feel at home. That was something that he hoped would not change between them, even if they both decided that they didn't have feelings for each other anymore. Or, well, in Talen's case, the feelings he had for someone else were stronger than they had been for Esca. He looked around the apartment, noting that nothing had really changed since the last time he was here. He chuckled at that. He was sure neither of them had changed...per say. Who knew, they could decide that they were going to still be together anyway.

He smiled at Esca and nodded. "Yes, I can't believe it either. He's seven months old already. It feels like I only bonded to him just yesterday. It's nice to finally have a daywher of my own though. I absolutely adore him, and he adores me. I know how you and Adi feel now. It is...a truly amazing feeling.." Ok so he was was rambling a bit again. He took a sip of his water, a slight red tinge coming to his cheeks.

A grin came across his face as Esca said that he wanted to be his friend, no matter what the two of them decided. That made him feel slightly better about the talk, but he was still nervous. Talen shrugged almost helplessly, his green eyes looking at Esca as he heard that question. "I..I don't know. I haven't had much time to think about it. My feelings for you...haven't changed..." That wasn't a lie. He still felt...a connection to Esca...it was just Cas was..a deeper connection. He wanted to see how Esca felt though before he mentioned Cas. "What about you? I mean, have you thought about us at all?"

[Parker]

"Yes, it is crazy how fast babies grow up." Esca agreed with a smile. Even Adianca had grown some from the time she bonded to him to now, but he was sure the growth of a newly hatched cub was even more amazing. "I'm so happy for you Talen. If anyone deserved to bond it's you and Khonlen seems absolutely precious." He stated honestly. Talen was a good man and he would be a great handler, Esca was sure of that. "Yes, it's a wonderful feeling isn't it?"

"I..I don't know. I haven't had much time to think about it. My feelings for you...haven't changed...What about you? I mean, have you thought about us at all?"

Esca's eyes averted from him as he declared that his feelings hadn't changed. Could he say the same? He really wasn't sure. His feelings for Talen as a friend certainly hadn't changed, but more than that...well, to be fair he had never really been sure what he felt for him other than an attraction. "I still care about you, Talen." He said as it was honest. "I have...yes..." Esca answered him, but couldn't bring himself to say anything else yet. A loud sigh was given as he rubbed his hand over his face before downing the rest of his glass. The white dragon in the room was simply too much for him to ignore.

"Alright, it's obvious that this conversation isn't easy for either of us." Esca stated bluntly. "I find you very attractive, Talen, and you are an amazing friend...but I can't say right now I feel anything deeper than that." He hung his head at the confession. "That doesn't mean that I couldn't feel more if we became more than just friends and a one night stand, but...I don't think I'm ready to be in an exclusive relationship. I..." he dipped his head again, "haven't exactly been celibate since we've been forced apart." He admitted softly, feeling a little bit guilty about it.

[Kate]

Green eyes danced at the praise Esca gave his Quartz. He was precious, and always would be. He knew the way he felt about his cub would never change. The feelings would just grow, for both of them. He knew it was pretty much just his pride, but he felt that Khonlen was one of the best daywhers ever. Maybe it was more because of his color, but that just made him even more amazing in Talen's eyes. A rare color, how had he gotten so lucky? Some days he felt as though it was all a dream and that he was going to suddenly wake up and it wouldn't be true. He heard his friend's voice and smiled a bit, nodding eagerly, not needing to say anything. He knew Esca knew exactly how he felt.

Talen could feel his heart beat a bit faster as Esca said he still cared about him. That was a good start right? He didn't know exactly what outcome he was hoping for though in all honesty. Part of him wanted to try a relationship with Esca, the first man he had had experience with. The other half of him, wanted to be with the man who had just confessed everything to him. One who he had been harboring feelings for for many Turns. He honestly did feel as though a weight had been lifted off his shoulders, to a point. No matter what happened, he still had his friends. No matter who he ended up being with, the other had already promised that they would still be friends. That was a relief in and of itself.

Talen couldn't help but blush a bit as he heard Esca talk about how this was difficult for both of them, and then went on to tell Talen he was very attractive. He frowned a bit as Esca said he didn't feel anything more than that, at the point. The green eyed young man could not say that he hadn't expected it. This is exactly what he had been afraid of, the feelings going away. Although, maybe there were never any true feelings, besides that of attraction and the one night stand.

He looked at him a frown on his face. Talen had known Esca probably had...needs...and when they were forced to not see each other, he hadn't really exactly expected him to wait. Honestly, part of him had, but that was the part that still believed in true love, love at first sight, which apparently did not exist. He finally managed a small smile, "I didn't really expect you to Esca...I know that everyone has needs. It must not have been easy on you after we were forced apart..."

He took a breath and said, "I..still care about you, but my heart also lies with another. It happened way back before I came here, and I ran from it..burying the feelings. He was my best friend, and it was frowned upon back home. Now he is here...and he confessed his love to me..I...just don't know what to do." He hung his head a moment, "Although, I guess I have my answer now..."

[Parker]

"I didn't really expect you to Esca...I know that everyone has needs. It must not have been easy on you after we were forced apart..."

Deep down, Esca knew that was a lie. That Talen had expected or at least hoped that he would have waited for him. He hung his head in guilt, feeling bad that he had hurt his friend. "It couldn't have been easy on you either, Talen. Please, you don't have to make up excuses for me. I'm sorry for hurting you." He could own up to his own mistakes. If he had to do it again...he probably wouldn't change anything. He meant what he said. He cared for Talen, but he wasn't in love with him. That didn't mean that he couldn't be. If Talen wished for them to try again to be a real relationship he...well...he didn't know what he'd do. He'd agree to it, of course, but as he said he wasn't ready for commitment.

"I..still care about you, but my heart also lies with another. It happened way back before I came here, and I ran from it..burying the feelings. He was my best friend, and it was frowned upon back home. Now he is here...and he confessed his love to me..I...just don't know what to do. Although, I guess I have my answer now..."

Esca finished his drink and sat down his glass before he moved over to Talen and clapped him on the shoulder. "Talen, I don't know much but...having your best friend confess their love for you...isn't something you should ignore. I'll be fine....we'll be fine." He gave him a wide smile. "As friends." Then he moved and poured himself a little more whisky. "Seriously, Talen. I'm happy for you. You deserve the best." He truly meant that and he knew that right now...he wouldn't be the best for him.

"So...what's he like? Do I know him?" Esca asked with a smirk. He felt like a weight had been lifted off his shoulders. It felt good to know what he and Talen officially was now. "I want details. How did he tell you how he felt?" Esca wanted Talen to feel comfortable talking to him about his relationship.