Fight or Flight, Sink or Swim ~ { Tag } Parker/Cas

The Crafter Complex is a series of buildings that contain craft halls and rooms for the crafters of New Atricis to work. There is a single dorm building for apprentices, while journeyman and masters live in second floor rooms in their respective crafts. Off to the side from the complex is the largest building, the Infirmary, where everyone in the Weyr receives Healer attention and desk workers keep track of who comes and goes at the entrance to the Infirmary.
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Ember
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Thu Feb 22, 2018 3:30 am

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You're going to do it? Excitement mingled in with her voice, bright and colorful, and were it a real, physical being, the opal would embrace her rider with the very essence of her words. Instead, she had to suffice with infusing them, and her thoughts, with as much love and warmth as she could muster up while they shared a common mental space with one another. Are you going to do it now?

After waiting so long, and making Fox push back, J'on was going to tell him how he felt. He was going to admit his love, he was going to tell him why he'd held back for so long. It hadn't been the first set of gifts, or even the third. What had started the entire cascade had been the arrival of Dashing. He loved the puppy so much, and it made him realize just how much Fox truly loved him. It had taken days, upon days after that for the last of the walls to come tumbling down, but they have finally been pulled, and now he was ready.

After making sure Dashing was settled on his bed - which was J'on's bed, but that was another matter to be taken care of later - he dressed himself in fine clothes and made sure he looked nice in the mirror. He was nervous, and he was scared, but he was ready for this, or at least he thought he was. Do you think he'll like it? Is it too much? Its too much, isn't it? I should just wear something comfortable in case its too much. Or maybe that won't be enough.

J'on... really. It won't matter, believe me. I don't think Fox is going to care what you're wearing, so long as you're with him.

J'on nodded, and headed out, but only after being told where to find Fox - Weyr Yard, under a tree. - in which case his footsteps took him towards the location in question once his feet touched ground. Des took back towards the pavilions once her rider was safely on foot, and he headed around, looking for Fox. He found him, a smile on his face, until he spotted someone semi-familiar with him. A woman.

She was touching him.

The way J'on had...

At the tavern...

Memories flashed before him, and his heart cracked and sank. The touch was lingering, far longer than it should for it to be considered a friendly touch. He wasn't moving her, wasn't stopping her, and bitter tears sprang in J'on's eyes. "How fucking stupid could I be..." He muttered under his breath before turning on his heel to get away before anything more happened with them. He didn't want to go back to his apartment, not now, not with all the reminders of Fox's "love" lingering in every single corner.

His feet started to carry him towards the crafthalls, in the direction of the forges. His eyes were blurred but he knew where to go. He needed to feel the heat surrounding him, needed to take out his hurt and anger on some metal. Needed to do it before he screamed. Des tried to calm him, said she'd speak to Fox, but he shook his head. Don't bother, don't bother with him at all.
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Parker
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Thu Feb 22, 2018 3:59 am

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Cas was in a remarkably good mood. The day had been an easy one for him and he had some how convinced his amazing boyfriend that they should enjoy a nooner before either of them had to do something after lunch. Ever since then it seemed like nothing could put him in a bad mood. Now he was getting ready to head to the little room he had in the crafthalls for his tattooing so he could work on a commission someone had paid for him. Yes, it meant spending some time away from Talen and the kids, but he was saving up the marks to get something special for the love of his life.

Plus, this tattoo he was going to do was possibly the biggest he'd ever tempted and it was going to take several sittings to complete it on the person it was for. A full back piece of dragons fighting thread. The person that had commissioned it was an older man who'd been a rider for longer than Cas had been alive. He wanted the tattoo to honor all the friends and loved ones he had lost thanks to their duty of protecting Pern. Cas wanted to do well by the tattoo, even if it was only going to be shades of black. First and for most, though, was getting the sketch done and approved.

For all he was in relaxed clothing, the part of Cas that was a weaver would never allow himself to dress too down unless he was doing dirty work. Clad in black pants, a deep blue tunic rolled up to the elbows, and a black vest. The compliment Talen gave him before he left their home had put a smirk on his lips that was still there now. Thinking about Talen and their afternoon...and possibly what would occur this evening...kept that smirk there and left him wildly distracted. So much that he didn't notice the other distracted man and ran right into him.

"Oh. I'm sorry. I wasn't paying attention. Are you..." Cas said as he put a hand on the arm of the person he ran into. However, one look at the man he could instantly tell something was wrong. "Hey, are you okay? Is something wrong?" He asked with genuine concern.
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Ember
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Thu Feb 22, 2018 4:04 am

J'on wanted to snap that he was fine, but he couldn't do it. Even if he was in a bad, sobbing state, he couldn't be pissy with another person just because they were trying to be considerate of him. He ran a hand over his face and nodded, trying to play it off as nothing despite the way he look at that moment in time. "I'm fine, really. Just... it's... nothing." He was a liar at that moment, something Cas would be able to see without too much effort, and J'on started to break down again. "Why does it have to hurt so much?" He didn't even know what he was saying, only that his heart was aching and he wanted to slide into some dank, dark hole and never emerge. "I'm never trusting anyone again after this. I just don't think I can do it..." He stopped, ran his sleeve over his face and apologized profusely. "Sorry, you don't need, and probably don't want, to hear this bullshit I'm spouting. Broken heart, sob story, all the fucking shit I'm just going to bottle up and never speak of again." It was better that way. It would have been better to just keep closed off like he had been when he arrived...
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Thu Feb 22, 2018 4:15 am

Cas was expecting the 'I'm fine, it's nothing' answer, but he didn't expect the young man to so quickly break down after that. He'd always been the sort to want to help people, didn't matter who they were, and with a protective streak a hundred dragon lengths long, he was instantly ready to do whatever he could for this upset man. "Alright, c'mon now, of course I want to hear if it's going to help." Cas assured him as he hooked an arm around the man's shoulders. "Broken hearts should never be dealt with alone. Come with me. First things first is to calm down and then maybe talking about it will give you some clarity and peace. I've got a bottle of whisky in my room. We'll get you a glass and then you can talk to me if you want. My room is just over here."

Cas lead the poor man to his place and quickly unlocked the door. His tattoo parlor was organized and cozy. A dresser with a large mirror sat at one end of the small room. On it was all of his instruments needed to do a tattoo. In front of that was a chair where his clients sat and a stool for himself. Near that was a small pedestal where a drawing notebook and charcoals were. Other than that the only furniture was a padded bench in case his needed his clients to lay to get their tattoo done, a comfy love seat to just sit on, and a small table with a tray of different alcohol. "Have a seat." Cas said as he lead J'on to the love seat and then got him and glass of whisky. Once he handed it to the man, he got his stool and put it in front of him and sat down. "Do you want to talk about it?"
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Ember
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Thu Feb 22, 2018 4:24 am

Did he want to talk about it? He wanted to resist. J'on was not the sort of person that gave in and spoke so easily about his emotions, about what he was feeling. It had been that way all his life. It had been that way upon coming to the Weyr, and it certainly had been that way since meeting Fox. But he was hurt, and he needed to know that the hurt was going to go away. It was his first time suffering a broken heart, and he wanted it go away. He thought maybe closing his eyes and willing it to leave him alone would do the trick but anytime he tried to do that, the image of the man he still loved appeared before him and he choked on a sob before his eyes flew open and he realized he was in the strangers room.

With the whiskey glass shaking in his hands, he started to try and explain everything, but it came in such short little bursts he wasn't even certain if he was making much sense. "He's been trying to woo me for so long, and I've been resisting. Holdbound ways, been told my whole life how wrong it is for men to love one another. Been told having feelings of any kind was wrong since I was little by my parents, things like that." He took down the whiskey in a single breath. It burned, it dulled the ache in his throat. It did not do the same for his heart. "It was the puppy... it was Dashing. He finally wore me down with Dashing. And I was going to tell him."

He ran a hand through his hair, his body trembling as he made the effort not to cry again. "But then I went to the Weyr Yard, where he was according to my Des, and he was there with a woman, and she was touching him, and it wasn't just a friendly touch either. They were sitting together so close, and he was looking at her..."
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Thu Feb 22, 2018 4:33 am

Cas's bright blue eyes flew a little wider as the man spilled everything that was wrong in one breath almost it felt. The turmoil this poor lad felt was palpable. He reached a hand out and placed it gently on the man's that wasn't downing the whisky in one go. At the same time he got the bottle and refilled his glass a little. "First things first, hon, you need to calm down. I know it's not easy, but it's important. So take a deep breath..." Cas took one himself. He found people in this sort of state would mimic what he did almost subconsciously. "And let it out slowly." Again he did it himself. "That's better. Now...let's take this one step at a time and break down what happened slowly. What's your name, hon? I'm C'sian, rider of Brown Gastoneth. Please, call me Cas."
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Ember
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Thu Feb 22, 2018 4:41 am

Breaths... breathing... he could do that. J'on found they helped, and as he calmed down, he noticed the panicked voice of his dragon started to calm as well. He nodded his head at Cas, glad that of all the people he could have run into at the Weyr, it had been someone so calm and genuinely caring. He still hurt, and he knew he would for a very long time, but at least he had someone that would help walk him through it, and maybe understand the process a little bit more. He just didn't know what to do next, or how to deal with any of this. It was the first time, and while they said there was always a first for everything, J'on didn't understand why a broken heart had to be one of them. "Hello, Cas. My name is J'on, but I don't go by anything else anymore." The only other thing... well, that didn't matter anymore, and only he had been allowed to call him that besides. "I ride opal Desdomondyth, and she says thank you for calming me."
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Thu Feb 22, 2018 4:50 am

A small smile tugged the corner of one side of his mouth up as J'on visibly began to calm down. Good, this was progress. He'd have to remember to thank his mindhealer boyfriend for teaching him a few tricks. "It is a pleasure to meet you J'on. Tell her she is very welcome." Cas took a moment to pour himself a glass of whisky and took a sip. "Bear with me a moment. Would you mind giving me a little more details of a few things?" Cas waited for him to give his permission before he asked anything else. "You say a man has been wooing you, but you've been resisting because of hold morals? How long has he been trying to woo you?" The whole hold morals thing he would try and loop back around to because he liked to think he knew something about that.
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Thu Feb 22, 2018 4:54 am

It didn't take much to recall how long it had been. J'on knew exactly how far back it all went. "We first met when I was nearing graduation. The wooing started a little while after that. He became determined to win me over, said he wouldn't quit. It didn't begin in earnest, with the gifts and the singing and the shouting from the cliffs..." He wouldn't tell anyone, but he'd actually found the shouting rather endearing. "Until the last couple of months or so. About that at least." Or that he was keeping the notes. If only to remember the few things that had... kept him happy. Or maybe it would be best to burn those. Because maybe they hadn't meant anything at all. Maybe they had been lies too.
Dirce L'van D'kellen D'ante V'ric Na'vi K'rios J'on
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Parker
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Thu Feb 22, 2018 5:01 am

A thoughtful look crossed Cas's face as the words 'shouting from the cliffs' escaped the younger man's mouth. That rang a bell. Yes, he was sure he'd heard something about a rider that was trying his damnedest to win over another that absolutely refused to accept his love. Cas never paid much mind to rumors, but he remembered he'd thought it was refreshing to hear a rumor about a man fighting for love than some of the others he'd heard lately. Apparently this was the man that was resisting. Cas didn't let on like he knew. "That's quite some time, and dedication, it seems like to try and win someone over to, then, toss it all aside instantly for someone else, don't you think? Have you ever seen him with this other person before?" He took another sip of his whisky, but his posture remained open and attentive as he listened to J'on.
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